"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
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