We're like a lot better than the average bears
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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