so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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