i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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