i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
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