I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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