Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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