Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
He has the fingertips of a God
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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