I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
