this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Randomize
