Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
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