fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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