Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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