maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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