I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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