I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
That was an excessively violent trivia night
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
