What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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