he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
