new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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