so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
