He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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