Cold hands, warm shart.
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
