My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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