you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I need to sanitize my soul.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
