I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Randomize
