She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
