Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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