Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Randomize
