How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
