Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
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