Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
