He disabled his match.com account in front of me
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
