My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
