Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
