Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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