you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Randomize
