I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
