So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
