Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
