I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
