Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
