THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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