Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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