went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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