I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Randomize
