two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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