if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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