Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
third nipple confirmed
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
