it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Sex in the backyard? Check.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
