You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I had to cum in my sink.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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